Every now and then I get Nostalgic… I designed these dresses 4 years ago..
After graduating I was doing a lot of freelance styling and running back and forth to Amsterdam to drop off clothing for magazine publications, and yes to see your clothing in magazines was amazing..

but back then I was too shy, too insecure, and not sharp enough, I would hardly get paid if I would get paid, It was just too early, then I went for a five day trip to New York, applied to a job and got the job,I had a salary:)

But seeing what my friends do now and what I could have been doing too… makes me so angry with myself..

I truly have an amazing job, I’m a trend forecaster, a Visionair, and create colors and trends seasons a head, not runway but inspirational, and when I was designing I didn’t made ready to wear, I believe things are not ment to last, so my clothing isn’t, I love the moment went things start to fall apart, like a flower, for me its most beautiful on that moment it starts to fade.. I like to capture that very moment..

My boss and coworkers don’t understand why I’m so resentful, but it is because of this, I’m comfortable, having a steady job and a salary and shop shop shop, buy buy buy, but my hearth lies with my creations, I want to touch and feel.. but after 4 years of a spoiled New York life, living an artist life in Paris? Be poor, sell nothing… My friends and parents want me to make the jump.. I’m like a fat cat..

Chictopia made me crave for designing again.. I want to embellish sheer tights, with beads, pearls, lace, whatever, loose treads, halfly falling apart….

Sad Sad so Sad, will feel better after buying some new shoes… 🙂

27 Comments on a sheer curtain floating

  1. Alex
    April 9, 2009 at 6:06 pm (10 years ago)

    I’m sorry, that must be hard for you. I think that if you still want to design and things like that why don’t you do it on the side while still living in NY? Your so creative and inspirational I’m sure people would buy your stuff. In the meantime…buying shoes wouldn’t hurt 🙂 xoxo

    Reply
  2. Jane Magnitude
    April 9, 2009 at 6:26 pm (10 years ago)

    Beautiful pieces! I just did a little feature on you on my blog, I absolutely love your style. Cheers!
    xo
    Jane Magnitude

    Reply
  3. Tariro
    April 9, 2009 at 8:33 pm (10 years ago)

    GO FOR IT AGAIN! NO ONE IS EVER DONE WITH SOMETHING! YOU WERE AND AMAZING DESIGNER AND YOU SHOULD KNOW IT! NOW YOU’RE JUST SMARTER ABOUT THINGS! GO LIVE YOUR DREAM!

    Sorry about the caps. Us young ones like caps. alot. alot alot

    Reply
  4. Yuka
    April 9, 2009 at 9:33 pm (10 years ago)

    wow you designed these? they are fantastic. you should do more of designing!

    Reply
  5. Mariam Ricci
    April 9, 2009 at 11:14 pm (10 years ago)

    i love the way the model is carring the shoe in her hand ^^ like you blog, so cute
    i’m following you (; XOXO

    Reply
  6. Sophia
    April 10, 2009 at 12:23 am (10 years ago)

    These are so pretty–pure and light. It’s tough to let a passion sit on the side. Have you tried to do some designing outside of work? It’s a shame if you were to let creativity and talent go to waste.

    BTW, this blog is great. Feeling style inspiration already from it. Keep it up. xx.

    Reply
  7. fashiongeometry
    April 10, 2009 at 12:47 am (10 years ago)

    I completely understand how you must feel. Though I design not in fashion, I share a similar ideal to create things. A good salary can certainly help flourish your future creations! Keep being inspired…it will get you to where you want to be 🙂

    Nora

    Reply
  8. daynacupcake
    April 10, 2009 at 1:02 am (10 years ago)

    I’m so happy you saw my feature 🙂 you’re one of my biggest inspirations. I’m in love with your style, and you!! <33 :*) I had no idea you were a designer back in the day. your pieces are unbelievable. I’m in awe. no wonder you’re so stylish and magnificently put together. I must meet you♥!! I want to be a fashion stylist- I have no idea where to start though. you should really start designing out of work as well. Maybe start designing as a hobby, just for fun since it’s such a pleasure for you to do. you’re magnificent at it. I would love to know more about what you do as well! xoxo
    love, dayna

    Reply
  9. Silent Doe
    April 10, 2009 at 1:16 am (10 years ago)

    You are truly an incredible woman, both of those dresses are soooo beautiful!! I know how you feel, but I think you should definitely keep designing and making clothing. You have such a great sense of style and from seeing these two dresses alone, you are really talented. I would love to see some of your other work sometime <3 You are truly an inspiration!

    Reply
  10. Tariro
    April 10, 2009 at 1:59 am (10 years ago)

    Thanks! and im 12. I meant that younger girls might look up to you and other girls in the industry who might not have taken the chance at first but go back for it

    Reply
  11. hellomell-o
    April 10, 2009 at 2:30 am (10 years ago)

    you should absolutely start designing again. those pieces are beautiful and you truly have some amazing talent. you’re only given one life! you should spend it doing what you truly love. good luck!! you’re amazing 🙂

    Reply
  12. Sushi
    April 10, 2009 at 3:14 am (10 years ago)

    Oh it makes me sad to hear that you are unhappy! You are the best thing since sliced bread, my dear, and it’s never too late to have a second try at something you love. You could start again, doing it on the side and see where it takes you from there? Remeber that you are an amazing girl and the sky really is the limit for someone with so much talent.

    By the way your blog is looking really lovely! Maybe turn off the borders around the images in the posts?

    Happy shoe shopping xoxo

    Reply
  13. elsalvador
    April 10, 2009 at 3:26 am (10 years ago)

    Coco, you got a blog! Yay!

    I love your designs. Is there any way you can design again? I’m adding you to my links 🙂

    Reply
  14. Anna G
    April 10, 2009 at 6:36 am (10 years ago)

    awww…. Big hugs!!

    I can’t help but feel the same. I like my major but I don’t it’s what I was meant to do. I think some time away from home will do me some good, but no money means no way to leave, unless I get my scholarship.

    I still haven’t found what I want in life. It’s so damn confusing!!

    Reply
  15. FrouFrouu
    April 10, 2009 at 11:22 am (10 years ago)

    I didnt know you had a blog!

    Wow, you’re so talented, I had no idea you designed. Glad to have found you in blogdom, I’ll be checking back frequently.

    – frouu

    Reply
  16. E
    April 10, 2009 at 1:56 pm (10 years ago)

    Aw, I feel like a lot of people go through this when you finally have to decide how the hell you’re going to make a living, but still reconcile doing the things you love. I’ve always tried to keep the things I’m passionate about and my work separate, because I felt like relying on my passion to make money could end up making me hate it, if that makes sense. But then, I suppose there are a lot of people who truly enjoy doing what they love as a profession. I dunno, it’s tricky. I love your designs, though, and you should at least keep it up as a hobby.

    Reply
  17. popcultureafternoon
    April 10, 2009 at 4:34 pm (10 years ago)

    Follow your heart! You have amazing style and I would wear any one of the dresses you posted!
    I feel so much passion in that post, I think your heart has decided but your brain is still in limbo. Just go for it!

    Reply
  18. Cookie
    April 10, 2009 at 8:11 pm (10 years ago)

    thank you soooooo much for your comment:)))) that’s nice.
    I,ve just read your post… to be honest… I feel that way too. I’m too scared to try, to take risk, feeling comfy with my job. I made four collections, was selling clothes to my friends, then I got a job and stoped designing. now I have time for only single designs. i’s so sad. i need to do something with it!

    Reply
  19. Cookie
    April 10, 2009 at 8:19 pm (10 years ago)

    ohh I’ve almost forget… these dresses are beautiful!! :))) design girl! design!!!
    hugs!

    i could’t find your e-mail on blog…

    Reply
  20. Matias Bouhet
    April 11, 2009 at 2:24 am (10 years ago)

    lovely white…. nice blog!

    Reply
  21. Isquisofrenia
    April 11, 2009 at 4:34 am (10 years ago)

    aww, girl thats so awesome
    i love it
    no matter what you know you have a talent
    and by the way yes NY is so rad
    I was only there for 7 days and i fell in love
    but yes start designing again
    you never know who might be interested
    xoxo!!!
    carla .Z

    Reply
  22. Carolina Botelho
    April 11, 2009 at 6:28 pm (10 years ago)

    First off all I want the secound dress! I’m absolutelly in love! And I think that you could do both at the same time.. have a job and salary, and try to create your own pieces.. and then you’ll see how things goes on.. and choose what is your destiny. never give up of your dreams please! that’s when life looses meaning. you’re very talented! please don’t give up!! 🙂 xx

    Reply
  23. Julie
    April 12, 2009 at 2:51 pm (10 years ago)

    you should start an Etsy shop. It might fill the void. I’m sure tons of people would be interested!! Those two dresses are utterly fantastic. Keep the faith 🙂

    Reply
  24. CultureCynic
    April 13, 2009 at 12:40 am (10 years ago)

    WOW talent is like whoa…please go back to designing again!!!!u ‘ve got to!!! but your job sounds amazing, a trend forecaster, i wld kill for that!!!! u can do it all!!!!

    Reply
  25. Heyla
    April 13, 2009 at 4:03 am (10 years ago)

    I loved the dresses. and I totally get your “resentment”, is normal to feel that when you have to balance the things you’re comfortable with and the things you crave for. Maybe keep the current job a bit longer, save money and then invest on your own collection? As long as you keep your talent untouched you can wait 🙂 & while having money, I don’t see why you can’t do both really,it’s sad to say but money moves mountains and with the right connections…you can do wonders.

    http://cscrapbook.blogspot.com/

    Reply
  26. Maria
    April 13, 2009 at 10:34 pm (10 years ago)

    Wow, those dresses are AMAZING! I’d love to see more of your work.

    Instead of regreting .. you should get in action!
    It’s never too late, and I’m sure that if you really want it (and it sounds like this is something that your heart aches for!) you can do it! Or else you’ll always wonder about it… right?
    You’ve already experienced it, so I bet you’re a hundred percent more secure and better now than when you just started after school.

    I hope you figure it out 🙂 and make the right choice

    x

    Reply
  27. SwanDiamondRose
    April 17, 2009 at 9:20 am (10 years ago)

    oh my goodness. you have to just go for it. now is better than later.

    Reply

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